4/16/12

What a blessed day!!!!The oldest great had her 11th birthday. May someday have to decide to grow up. Also your brother, Sid, had a birthday today. He has "caught up" with me again. I wanted to call him to wish him a happy birthday but don't have a phone#.      Benny came by today, did the termite check, he said no sign of termites.      I am feeling weak, I had another nose bleed today. I called Dr. Dumas office, he said to get to Dr. Real about it. I had three bleeds last year, he had told me then I needed to see Real but I didn't get to him. Any way, after a nose bleed, I feel very weak. Now I have had 3 bleeds in the past 6 days, so each time I lose more blood guess I will feel weaker. I know I will be alright, just when?        Sometimes I get to feeling so lost again without you. Seems I will be doing so good. Bam, bottom falls out. I don't know whether I should start all over screaming, crying, or just keep trying to stay with the mostly silent tears.        I begin to wonder, what now Lord?         I did finally get all the laundry I had done and was doing, folded and put in the basket. Haven't felt like trudging up the stairs with the basket full of clothes.         Honey,  I know you can see and you are not an disabled person anymore. Where does that leave me? Alone. I miss you and I love you.............BILL-EE