Nov 30, 2011

Ben, I just home. After church I went out to eat with David, Sarah, and Jared Hall. We went to Applebees, in Bessemer. It is past 11:30, we ate a full meal. It was a good time. We four have had a year, with Jan's death and yours. We are all surviving, with the Lords help. Last night and today hasn't been easy for me, I think of you all the time. I sometimes get to thinking what could I have done better to make things easier for you. Sometimes it is why did I do this or that or why didn't I do something else. Makes everything even more painful. Makes my missing you so much worse. Honey I don't know how to put my thoughts down, but I think you could get the picture. Tomorrow is the Sears Retiree Christmas luncheon and yes, I am going Lord willing. Debbie will be down to go with me. I am looking forward to it and yet I am kind of dreading it. It will be the first, I have seen all those people. I saw quite a few at your visitation service and at the funeral service. I just don't want anyone to think they shouldn't ask questions or to tiptoe around me. I'll write in the next note and tell you how it goes. It is late and cold and icy, the heating unit is coming on, even set on 65 degrees. Whoa, cold!!!! Honey I love you and I miss you...........BILL-EE